The Absent Father...

June 19, 2016

Every absent father will have his own story to share, even if he has contributed to his own painful situation himself, however, it does not mean he does not feel the pain of not seeing his kids...


Many fathers after many years still find it hard to think of what they did that was so bad, that causes them to be labelled as an Absent Father.


Many fathers have to deal with the independent spirit of a baby mother, who feels they do not need any man to help bring up their kids because their own mother did very well bringing them up without a father in their own life, does it mean the kids have to suffer?


Many fathers have to fight their ex-baby mothers who have lost all trust and confidence in them, in some cases, the baby mother's way of thinking may be right, if they are really worthless, do the kids have to suffer for having a worthless father?


At the same time many  fathers have to deal with baby mothers, who are just messed up with their own personal agendas in life, and changing a baby father to them is like changing their underwear, but again, do the kids have to suffer if the baby mother just want to change the man in her life or to be free of the one she has.


Many fathers have to deal with a legal system that gives lip services to Fathers’ Rights, and then looks the other way when the baby mother makes all types of allegations against the baby father, again do the kids have to suffer for the lies the baby mother has made known in any legal procedures, that has an impact on his access to him seeing his kids.


Many Fathers are just so tired because their voices are not being listened to even when they are on the right. 


Sadly many fathers have thrown the towel in representing their legal struggle because the emotional and financial struggle not to be labelled as an Absent Father gets to them in the end.


It is true that kids are much stronger than they look, and can bounce back from the worst of fatherless childhood experiences, but that does not make it right.


Many kids who have been programmed under the legal heading of Parental Alienation Syndrome by a baby mother will find it hard to have any meaningful relationship with their father one day if they do not try to give their father the opportunity to communicate his version of events.


An Absent Father having contact with his kids one day, can try to build bridges with his kids by trying to have a meaningful relationship, even if he was a worthless father, but one thing for sure he will never be able to replace the absent memories that have comforted many fathers in their twilight years of life, knowing that they did right by their kids.


Because the trust in the legal system or an ex-bitter twisted baby mother has robbed them of those sweet memories of being a father, in those winter month of some fathers lives, since they have lost all contact with their kids.


With my own personal experiences, I feel qualified to encourage any young person both men and women, to be mindful who you have your kids with, because do the kids really have to suffer???


And to you "Baby Mothers" who are still offended by the term “Baby Mothers” to you I say “Suck it up”.


And to those family members of the mother, some times family members must share some of the blame when it comes to encouraging a mothers way of thinking in not allowing a father access to his own kids, especially if you know better and the consequences and the damage to any future relationship with a father and his kids.


In closing it is a big shame that the scriptures have no value in the life of an independent baby mother since many of them are in church today, otherwise, she would be listening to the Aged Women of the Christian Congregation and do better - Titus 2:1-15, since many spiritually mature women of the church who are very keen to see families stay together, or at least a father to be a father to his own kids.






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